reflections of a 20year old
two decades later and i am still searching for myself. uncertain of the answers and totally unclear about my plans for the future.

many a times a look at my life and i cant help but wander what it is that i have achieved. what have i to be proud about. what it is that makes me...me. does simply having once been a sports person, making decent grades or entering into a much sought after course in the university make me a successful person? if yes then why do i feel that so much is still lacking in my life? i dont feel that there is something that i can truely be proud of. something that is truely mine and that i can call my own. i wish to be proud of the person that i am and to be known and remembered that why and not simply for what i have accieved. if anything at all.

was talking to my girlfriend and was telling her how much i wished i could believe in love that was happy ever after. the simple idealistic believe of love forever. when you meet someone, believe that thats who you will be spending the rest of your life with. but i just cant..cant seem to be able to give all of myself. and i do wish i could. cos life would be so much more simple and easier to live.

as always my mind seems incapable of thinking coherently and i am just rambling thoughts off the top of my head that i doubt even make sense.